Like a candle, our wick of spirit is encased in our humanity, and when our spirit is touched, we light up until all we know melts and changes shape for the burn of our experience. Repeatedly, our sweat and struggle burns our sense of self and world away, so that our Divine spark can be released, again and again. These moments of Spirit-Lighting-Up not only rearrange our lives, but they light and warm those who stay near.
In such moments, we become one with what we see, and this sudden Oneness is what the faithful of all paths have called Love. And in the illumination of Oneness called Love, all that’s left is a willingness toward birth, an urge to be touched by something timeless and fresh. All that’s left is the want of deep parts in strangers. To relish the waking over being awake, the burning over being burned, the loving over being loved.
When we can be – no matter how briefly – at one with what we have in common with all life, we are rewarded beyond attachment and ownership. This is the difference between becoming a singer and becoming the song. This is the best of ambition: that the dancer melts into the dance, and the lover melts into the act of love, and the builder melts into the thing being built, until in a burst of Oneness, dancer and lover and builder are one.
Perhaps momentarily, when swimming with the stream, we are the stream; when moving with the music, we are the music; when rocking the wounded, we are the suffering. Perhaps momentarily, when thinking without masks, we are pure thought; when believing without doubt, we are God. Perhaps love is an instrument we play for all we’re worth in an orchestra yet to be convened. Perhaps this is why, in the fullest moments of loving or knowing or being, we go nameless and timeless and breathless – everything about us used up, like a candle, burned over and over, just to light entire rooms with our flicker.
This is a poem I had read at my union ceremony with my husband this past fall and it was such a beautiful representation of life in love.
Prayer. Grace. Blessing. Giving thanks. Honoring. These are some of the names that we call the ritual in which we give thanks for the food we partake in. This ritual is something that I myself never really participated in the act. I decided to research this topic because my husband practices this daily with every meal he partakes in and I asked him why and his response was “ I give thanks for the meal as well as blessing it”. This sparked my curiosity.. His ritual began as a child. In his family prayer before meals was always a thing that was done despite the fact that they were not heavily religious. The reasoning and understanding of prayer before a meal changed however as he got older and found his own connection with the divine.
As a child my mother never participated in it and my father religiously participated in this ritual. However with my father it was a forced practice that never had meaning behind it. We said a standard prayer whose meaning was unknown to us as children and religion was forced upon us and was never embraced. So when it came to prayer it was not something that we wanted to keep up because of the lack of choice and understanding. But now prayer is absent from his home at meal time. Or at least I have not seen him pray over his food in years.
As I got older I went through a series of changes spiritually and personally which heavily influenced my religious beliefs however food was not a part of this. However with family gatherings with my maternal Grandparents we always gather around our food, old and young, we hold hands while my grandfather leads us in grace. It is such a beautiful experience I get overwhelmed with emotion and overflow with tears of love and gratitude. Recently I had my first Thanksgiving and first holiday with my husband and our families and while at his grandmother Mama Julie’s house and they did they same thing. We all large and small gathered around, heald hands, and Mama Julie lead us in thanks and gratitude for everything including the new additions to the family. It was absolutely beautiful and heartwarming as well as extremely emotional. It definitely made me stop and give extra thanks to everything.
Not in this sense. I am forever aware of my food and its sourcing and quality. I even have looked into the studies of Dr. Masaru Emoto and his study Double-Blind Test of the Effects of Distant Intention on Water Crystal Formation 2006 on the effect of words on water. In this study he looks at the effect that positive or negative words have on water crystal formations. But I have never put this into play for myself. Why.. Who knows.
Upon evaluation I was thinking about the question “what do I think it means and communicates?” posed to us in this assignment as it pertains to this topic. Upon reflection I realized that I subconsciously judged those that practiced this ritual. Not thinking that they were bad but feeling like they must be very religious. And for me that was not the best association to have. But now I have a very different outlook after self reappraisal. I realize that the negative association to this ritual was one that stems from my less than ideal relationship with my father. I had no idea how much I projected those old feelings onto those that surround me known or unknown.
In my research there was no definite answer as to when this ritual began in history. I can only imagine that it has been around since the beginning of time. When you look through ancient records food was always exalted and glorified and I would assume dangerous I know) that prayer and thanks were part of this. In Anthropology we learned that in many ancient cultures the blessed their food to ward in the belief that it wards off evil spirits. This belief is still held in some cultures today. The evil spirits were unbenounced to them were bacteria that would cause foodborne illnesses.
In other cultures such as religion it is a means to give thanks to a higher power such as God, Jesus, Allah, ect. In more spiritual persons I found that it is a way to give thanks to all life forms that were sacrificed for the meal as well as invigorate the meal with light and energy. I found one page that had a beautiful and simple blessing that is as follows
I offer my deepest gratitude for this food I’m about to receive
I invite all life forms present into a state of harmony
I ask for the strength, energy and nourishment needed at this time,
to bring balance to my body, mind and spirit.
Thank you! (Or Amen).
(Horus Healing, Why to pray for your food)
On this same site they talk about the way that our food vibrationally screams until we calm it with prayer (p2). According to this site the studies of ex CIA agent Cleve Backster who was responsible for formalizing the lie detector test after leaving the CIA used the same equipment to test plants and their conscious awareness you could say. He connected the plant to the equipment and proceed to set a leaf on fire and the plant began “screaming” and did not stop until Cleve left the room (p5).
I think that this ritual is something that is often overlooked by those similar to myself because of the religious stigma that accompanies it. If people knew the real power of it I think that they would feel very differently and include it in their daily ritual. Doing this simple yet powerful act can vibrationally transform whatever we eat. This is “magic” but it will not negate or dismiss the foods low nutrition content or make it something that it is not physically but the energy does not lie.
Who am I? This is a question that for most of my life I was not sure of, and that now I am only starting to understand the true depth of me. I am a huge believer in the thought that a person is as good as what he puts in his mind, body, and spirit.
For me I have always been hugely connected although I was not always aware of the depth of that connection. After going through my own health struggles I realized that my physical health was directly related and completely tied to my spiritual health. The connection of my life to my inner world has been apparent to me for many many years after a major traumatic awakening. Since it was made apparent to me I’ve been working diligently to heal the wounds of my inner world so that I am I fully live in the now.
My entire life I was so heavily armored with literally every armor that there is to protect myself from everything that surrounded me. From the opinions of my parents, the traumas of my childhood and life. The way that our social system was set up so that those things could never be fully healed or addressed so that I am an adult I struggled with the effects of these.
After suffering such traumas my entire life I was so heavily armored with literally every armor that there is to protect myself from everything that surrounded me. The generational traumas came full circle in my life. I literally just as I was typing this realized I have in my own lifetime have directly been affected by every trauma that was suffered by my family for generations. From molestation, rape, domestic violence, teen pregnancy, near death multiple times, and I survived it all! I survived it all so that I can transmute it! I am so eternally grateful for this beautiful revelation and the end of this generational trauma.
Recently my husband and I were listening to an audio recording of the Willie Lynch book in the 1700s. It is called The Willie Lynch letter and the making of a Negro. In that book it talks about the way to break a human is equal to that as breaking a horse. It states that you have to traumatize it in such a way that it is completely unable to heal because it knows no other way to live.
When I heard everything that was being ranted in this book I was appalled. Not only because of the racism that was being spewed in it of course; Willie Lynch was a slave owner teaching other slave owners how to properly slave own and break them beyond repair and continue to do it so you have people who know no other way. The worst part is the fact that this still continues to this day and this was hundreds of years ago.
After listening to John Trudell in class I explored more of his music. When I listened to a talk that he gave it was called what happened to the tribes of Europe. It blew my mind because I never thought of that. Here in America obviously were not taught of these things we’re only thought of a limited amount of history.
In that speech he mentioned how the tribes in Europe were tortured and enslaved for 20 generations before Columbus came to America. With that it’s crazy to think about how deeply rooted this pain is and this trauma is in our society.
As you can see our social system was set up so that those things could never be fully healed or addressed so that one could fully grow past them. Illustrated perfectly in the book mentioned above. These wounds are that of the collective and has been going on for generations and I strongly feel like this age is ending.
This trauma is on purpose as we learned with Rockefeller it is designed to be this way there is no other way that they would have it. This was done in such a perfect way that the trauma has moved through the collective for centuries the trauma is the operator for the machine in our head. The machine in her head is so rigged to be on auto pilot that most never awaken to the truth of them selves or what they might be.
In the society that we have there are some who have full knowledge of everything that is going on they have the knowledge of our true power they have the knowledge of our true divinity and I also have the knowledge that most do not have this knowledge and they use that to their advantage.
This is exactly what keeps the social hierarchy going this is the foundation of the pyramid life. This life is one that starts in infancy with parents and children separated at at 2 months old. This is exactly what Willie Lynch said would break the family. To have control you have to take the parents away and put somebody else in charge of the children. The family connection will not be there for this or the next generation and so on. The child is then brought up under the guidance of the pyramid always being taught that he cannot get to the top but he should strive his best to be the best worker that he can be.
With this way of life evolutionary mismatch is a guarantee. It’s not something that we are ignorant to, the powers that be are very aware of the fact that there is evolutionary mismatch going on and the implications that it has and they are profiting in every way possible. The biggest way that they do this is in our healthcare system.
The American Healthcare system creates the cure after the corporate system creates the issue. This is the foundation of Modern healthcare was if we can’t get them to come to us and we will give them a reason to need to come to us. In our world now with genetically modified foods and pesticides and chemical infiltration from everywhere they are guaranteeing that the problem is made. Especially in the everyday person because that person probably does not know the negative effects of these things.
For years I worked in healthcare and the only thing that it did for me was teach me that that is not healthcare and it’s not the kind of care that I want for my life. When I was faced with cancer I took my life into my own hands and used my mind body connection and cured it in months. After this occurred and I truly discovered how strong I truly was I knew that I needed to help other people to realize the same thing.
The last few days I’ve really been sitting with myself and clearing out all of the limitations that I felt it been placed in my subconscious. All of the opinions of others, judgments, or the lack of acknowledgment from others as I’ve recently realized that I’ve had my entire life.
I have felt like my body was stripped to the core of my being. After feeling so frustrated and so overwhelmed with life almost like I wanted to give up. I decided to take a moment and go outside and ground to earth and find my stability again. I found myself laying in the grass under the sky being filled up with rays of light. At that moment I realized who my mother was I realize who my father was. The earth my mother and the sun my father. The universe in my soul. I felt that depth that love that infinite connection that I’ve been searching for.
Although I have found the love of myself that deep connection to everything else had been forming but not quite apparent to me. I then decided to go into a very deep meditation. I cleansed my body with sage then I sat I went into my soul. It felt all of my limitations, all of my fears, everything had been lifted. It feels as if my soul lifted out of my body my body was purified. I was brought back into my body and felt lighter than I ever have before. It was truly something I’ve never experienced in my life and when I rose I felt for the first time completely me completely connected completely sure completely limitless.
So to answer the question of who I am.. I am the stars in the sky, I’m the earth, I am the river, I am the birds, I am the trees, and the plants, and animals. I am everything. We are all one. As soon as humanity can get back to that connectedness that is when healing through healing true transformation will occur.
Thank God we are on our path back to our oneness. I am so grateful to be back on this planet in this body at this current time and space so that I may be a part of the evolution of this planet. So that I may be a part of and witness the growth and the transformation that is so necessary.
For my career path I decided to go back to my roots. The roots of who I was as a child and that is helping other children. Helping the children to know that they have a purpose, that they have a power, and with practice they can create a life in the world that they are so proud to live in. It is time to end the traumas to and the generational issues so that we may live fully in connection in love and power and in peace
In life we are unconsciously molded. We are molded by our family, our environment, and these then create our subconscious mind. I was raised in the inner city by a mother who was brought up in a family where love was ever present however communication as not. And to a father who communicated his love with yelling and anger to cover his underlying fear.
In this essay I will dive into my self-concept vs self-esteem and how they came to be, the becoming of my presenting self, the ultimate discovery of my perceived self. I will review the influences of the significant others in my life which created the reflected appraisal that I formed in response to the reference group I was surrounded by. My unlearning, finding and discovering of the who that I’ve always been.
My mother, the most significant of the people in my life was born and raised in rural South Dakota near Sturgis. She was the oldest of 5 children born to my grandmother and grandfather who have been married since 1964. She grew up in a farm house that was built by my grandfather’s father in the early 1900’s. My grandmother was a stay at home wife who made 3 meals a day from scratch for her family and the farm hands. There was order, love and a bit of chaos. With this love there was no communication. No discussions of mental health or feelings, no hugs and I love you’s. Love was expressed through food and there was always an abundance of it.
My father was born in metro Denver and was somewhere in the middle of 12 children. His father was not present however my grandmother remarried when he was a teen. My grandmother ruled with an iron fist and highly relied on corporal punishment to run her household. Communication was had at a minimum and when necessary but when it happened to be heard you had to yell and that worked only if you were lucky. And if you were heard you usually were not payed attention to for the opinions of children were not valid.
My parents met while working together in 1985 at the YMCA in Denver after my mother took a bold leap to move to Colorado on her own. Six months after I was born my parents married and by the time I was one they had divorced.
My earliest memory was that of my father yelling at 4 year old me to walk faster because we had experienced car issues and had to walk to a payphone to call for help. Just like that one of the first reflected appraisals that occurred in my life. At the tender age of 4 I believed I was slow and caused problems in my father’s life
When I was 5 I remember my father yelling at me for telling my stepmother about a beautiful necklace that we had just got for her. He told me I have a big mouth and couldn’t keep a secret. The second consciously recorded reflected appraisal letting me know that I talked too much and was incapable of being trusted.
At 6 I was molested by my father’s brother while at my grandmothers home. Being young and confused I wasn’t sure what happened. I told my mom and she quickly reacted with love for me and a phone call to the police and then to my father. He told my mom that he was sure that that hadn’t happened and that I was confused. My grandmother said the same thing. Another appraisal completed, this time the message received this time was that I was not important enough for others to care about what happened to me.
At 7 I realized that I was unlike those around me. My skin color was the most noticeable difference. The cultures that I was submerged in while blended within me were very different and I didn’t quite fit into either. That pattern continued throughout my twenties. The reference groups that I was surrounded with were african americans whom I was raised with that felt I didn’t belong because my skin was too light. On the contrary the caucasian reference group was not better in fact many were more outwardly biased based on the color of my skin. I was always assumed to be of some exotic ethnicity but never fathomed I was half caucasian.
As I went through my teen years mostly keeping to myself as I never quite fit in. I always had just one to two friends one of them possibly close to me. But always at a distance as I was unwilling to self disclose, when I did it was often built on my presented self rather than my perceived self because it was safe. I knew how to be accepted. I knew my past was not the most pleasing so I chose to hide it away in a safe place.
As an adult while working in the emergency room of University Hospital after many years of carefully forming my face and creating a carefully formed impression management skills to help me to assimilate in this curious world I had a eye opening experience. Nurses asked me if I spoke spanish. I told them that I did not and one said well at least her parents taught her english. I was appalled but not surprised because I knew that these were not just the isolated opinions of one but the wide spread biases in the world. No matter the presenting self I created I was still a brown face in a white place and no matter where I was from people would see me however they chose.
Within my own social group there was little difference. My “friends” who were now my reference group for my presenting self. I was considered “white washed” due to my proper grammar usage and annunciation. No matter where I was I just didn’t seem to fit.
In my late 20’s I went through a series of traumas in relationships and in life. I experienced a unbecoming of who I had thought I was. A letting go of the thoughts and ideas that had been imprinted on my subconscious. I was thrusted into a discovery of Ashley. It was a learning of what I always knew but had somehow been lost.
After many days and nights spent alone, many many self help books and podcasts for days. I had to release all of the negative reflective appraisals that had been stored in my subconscious that were offered to me by the significant others in my life. I finally was able to catch a glimpse of the woman I truly was my.. perceived self. She is a glorious being who I cannot wait to continue diving into and exploring further. I have begun the process of accepting my perceived self and the merging of my presenting self into the same being. This is a process that has taken courage beyond imagination. But the reward has been great. I am now able to fully self disclose in all relationships because I now accept myself. I now have the self esteem that I lacked for so many years. This is the key to unlocking my life and creating a life that I can be proud of and that can inspire others.
Imagine, it’s a hot summer day, the sun is shining, the birds chirping and you light up the grill for you favorite foods. Burgers, brats, dogs and chicken; add a little bacon to it and walah! Its perfect!
We share these delicious things with those that we love the most, our children, our parents and our neighbors. When we do we also share with them carcinogens such as PHA’s. Polycyclic aromatic hydrocarbons (PAHs) are chemicals formed when muscle meat, including beef, pork, fish, or poultry, is cooked using high-temperature methods, such as pan frying or grilling directly over an open flame. In laboratory experiments, HCAs and PAHs have been found to be mutagenic—that is, they cause changes in DNA that may increase the risk of cancer.
Within minutes of eating dead meat bacteria toxins, the body gets a burst of inflammation, stiffening, or paralysing of the arteries. This alone shows how toxic the food we are eating is for us. Our lifestyle is what is killing us.
One study shows that atherosclerosis is not caused by old age. Examination of American casualties during the Korean and Vietnam wars showed significant atherosclerosis by age 18 or 20. Their Asian counterparts, raised on diets consisting mainly of rice and vegetables, had much healthier arteries. The elderly are more likely to have heart conditions not because of genetics, but because they may have indulged in unhealthful habits, like smoking and poor diet, for longer periods of time. Your doctor can tell you if you are one of only about 5 percent of the population with a genetic tendency toward heart disease.
Many studies show the connection between lifestyle choices and heart health. An article published by Caldwell Esselstyn Jr., M.D., in the American Journal of Cardiology explains that stenting and bypass surgeries may only be a solution for a minority of patients, while a transition to a plant-based diet free of cholesterol proves to be a more effective treatment.
At the University of California in San Francisco, Dr. Ornish tested the theory that a more potent diet, along with other lifestyle changes, might actually reverse heart disease. He selected patients who had plaques that were clearly visible on angiograms and split the patients into two groups.
Half were referred to a control group in which they received the standard care that doctors prescribe for heart patients. The other half began a vegetarian diet in which less than 10 percent of calories were contributed by fat. They were also asked to begin a program of modest exercise and learned to manage stress through a variety of simple techniques. The patients started to feel better almost immediately. After one year 82 percent of the patients who followed Dr. Ornish’s program showed measurable reversal of their coronary artery blockages. The plaques were starting to dissolve with no medications, no surgery, and no side effects.
While the control group, following the more traditional medical routine, did not do as well. Most patients’ chest pain did not go away, but continued to get worse, and their plaques continued to grow, cutting off blood flow to the heart a bit more with every passing day.
This information is shocking. These and many other studies have been done showing the direct link between eating a standard to multiple health problems such as cardiovascular disease and cancer.
As Several studies have shown changing to a vegetarian diet has immediate and long-term positive health effects. Changing your diet to a vegetarian or vegan one will have many positive side effects. In addition to healthy inside your skin will be clear your body will feel good you’ll be more energized for your busy life.
The chart above is one that shows the rate of heart disease in countries around the world. You will find that countries with the lowest rates of cardiovascular disease are those that have a diet that is more plant based or whole food based.
It’s time for America and so many countries around the world to wake up. The world is not getting healthier and these unhealthy traditions are being passed along. We can stop this now. With our children. Every meal is a choice, an investment in your life.
American Heart Association. Heart Disease and Stroke Statistics At a Glance .heart.org/idc/groups/ahamah-public/@wcm/@sop/@smd/documents/downloadable/ucm_470704.pdf. December 17, 2014. Accessed October 16, 2017
Chemicals in Meat Cooked at High Temperatures and Cancer Risk. National Cancer institute. cancer.gov/about-cancer/causes-prevention/risk/diet/cooked-meats-fact-sheet. Accessed October 17, 2017
Center For Disease Control. Heart Disease Facts. cdc.gov/heartdisease/facts.htm. Accessed October 16, 2017
Written By Ashley Eugene Founder of Higher Love, June 2019
Epigenetics began as research that focused on combining genetics and developmental biology. This field was first discovered by scientist Conrad H Waddington and Ernst Hadorn. The term epigenetics was coined by Waddington in 1942 and was originally described the influence of genetic process on development. In the 1990’s a renewed interest started with research into genetic assimilation.
Epigenetics is the study of changes in the expression of genes in the DNA. Genes carry genetic information from one generation to the next. These genes are located in a fixed position on a chromosome. They hold within them the blueprint for our body. However in recent years research has shown that there are many other factors that contribute to gene expression. Factors such as nutrition, the environment in which we live, and lifestyle have more impact on our genes or rather our gene expression than originally thought.
Epigenetics looks at the way genes change and express themselves over the span of our lifetime and whether those gene changes can be passed to other generations. In the study of epigenetics research into the reasons why identical twins develop in such different ways although they have the same genetic blueprint.
One analogy that I love for this is as follows “Epigenetics is the genetic punctuation. It will not change the words in the DNA paragraph but it will change the message that is relayed by rearranging the punctuation in the paragraph.
There are many types of epigenetic processes such as methylation, phosphorylation, and acetylation to name a few.
First let’s review. Genomes are all of our hereditary information. The Epigenome is the genome that determines what is turned on or off in the blueprint of our DNA. Every cell in our body has DNA. Chromatin (histones) bind together to let the genes know if they should express. Chromatin is the spool that DNA winds itself around. Histones change how tightly or loosely the DNA is wrapped around the histone spool. The looser it is wrapped the more the gene is expressed. The tighter it is the less it is expressed.
In our DNA we have DNA methylation the adding or removing of Carbon and Hydrogen CH3. Methyl groups are like a switch. Chromatin are like a knob. Every cell has a different methylation and chromatin pattern that is what tells the cells what to do. These tell the cells whether they are for your brain, nerves, lips, eyes, or any other part of your body and let them know their job in that area.
Another way to look at this is the DNA is the hardware of the computer. The Epigenome is the software that decides whether a gene is expressed or not.
Our genes can change over time or in a instant depending on what is happening in our lives. Changes such as puberty happen slowly over time. In this time the body is giving the cells new information to tackle new tasks in the body. These include menses, hair growth, and physical changes. Another example is pregnancy. When pregnancy occurs the cells must quickly change to meet the increased demand of the mother’s body and the new life that is growing within her.
There are recent studies on twins that grew up in separate households and what affects genes had on them. They were looking at nature vs nurture. Scientist were curious what genes were affected by our DNA (genes) or nurture (environment).
The research showed that things like criminal behavior and addiction were more strongly influenced by nature whereas things like emotional health, illness such as cancer and dietary preference were influenced more by nurture or the environment that they were raised in.
They are also looking into the reason that twins that were raised in the same household with relatively the same environment one twin is more likely to develop autism, asthma, and bipolar disorder.
Today research shows that a large variety of behaviors, illness, and various other health indicators that link to epigenetics. These include cancer of almost all types, respiratory, cardiovascular, reproductive, autoimmune, cognitive issues and neurobehavioral illness. There are several suspected or known factors that can have an effect on these. These include the food we eat, the toxins we ingest, lifestyle choices, heavy metals, smoking, radioactivity, exhaust, and bacteria are among some of the causes for epigenetic malformations.
In 1970 when the epigenome was discovered. When originally discovered the thought was that most epigenomes are stripped before they are passed along. New evidence shows that epigenomes get stuck and are passed from one generation to the next. Now we know that parental methylation patterns can be passed down for up to for generations. In studies with mice they were heavily exposed to high levels of fungicide and insecticide and had decreased sperm production and that gene mutation was passed down for 4 generations.
According to the Journal of Proteome Research November 2005 issue by Nilamadhab Mishra, the Wake Forest University School of Medicine says that they were able to link histone modification and mechanisms underlying lupus like symptoms in mice and that these effects could be reversed with a drug called trichostatin A. This seems to reset the histone modification by correcting hypoacetylation at the histone sites reversing the symptoms.
With all of the information that we now know about epigenetics and how what we eat, do, where we live, and the choices we make will impact not only our lives but that of those to come. This gives us the power back as well as giving us a huge responsibility to our future. Knowing that we are pre dispositioned to nothing is a huge. In our blueprint we can design our genes to best suit us and our lives if we are dedicated to it.
Bruce H. Lipton, The Biology of Belief: Unleashing the Power of Consciousness, Matter & Miracles, Hay House, Incorporated, Oct 11, 2016
Jeffrey M Craig and Nicholas C Wong, Epigenetics: The Reference Manual, Caister Academic press, 2011
Mukherjee, Siddhartha. “Same but Different.” New Yorker, May 2, 2016
Nilamadhab Mishra, Journal of Proteome Research, November 2005
Trygve Tollefsbol, Transgenerational Epigenetics, University of Alabama at Birmingham, 2014